The 365

Dates are important to me.  Well, some dates.  I'm sorry to admit, Mr. B., although you were a fascinating teacher and story teller, most of History's dates haven't stuck with me any longer than necessary for passing the quizzes excepting a few... But the ones that pertain to my life, stick a little too well at times.

Anywho, because I'm that kind of girl, tonight is a teensy nostalgic, sorta lonely and completely ridiculous.  I have yet to work out the mess in my head connected to this date, not to mention one or two rapidly approaching next week.

I'm sick of grasping at protective emotions as a coping mechanism.  I'm tired of "looking at the bright side" as if I could actually see something usable there.  So today, since sleep beat me up again last night, I took a nap.  Twice.   The naps helped, at least as far as "going through the motions" is concerned, but tonight I'm afraid will be longer than last night.  I've determined to set my mind on What Is, not on What Isn't. I've been going through the pages of pictures of memories and change this little family of mine has experienced in 365 days, I'll share:

Last October we took our first "new" family vacation.  We went "home" for me- Paradise Valley, MT.  I love fall colors, barns, mountains, wildlife, and Yellowstone. I can't believe how much I had missed this place.

On this trip I drug along another single mom and her kids.  We took an insane number of detours to find photo-graphical barns.  We ate in every restaurant in Gardiner (which is not hard to do in three days).  We even bought the nonsense touristy stuff I swore I'd never own.

With very little cell service, ridiculous music blasting on repeat- with 5 partially tone-deaf children singing along at the top of their lungs, a good cup of coffee and a sweet friend, THIS was a perfect vacation:

December brought a new adventure.  We packed up snow gear, food, gifts and clothes and headed south to Northern Arizona.  The kids hadn't been to see Grandma and Grandpa in years, in fact only one even remembered their house.  We had a sweet time reconnecting with two of my brothers, a niece that had never laid eyes on her cousins, and my parents.  There was more snow there than what we had back in Montana, so the kids spent the days teaching their Californian cousin how to build snow creatures.  We spent the final day of vacation at the Grand Canyon.  It cannot be stressed enough:  I LOVE my family.  All of them, even the quirky ones....

In February, I was invited to crash my sister's party in San Antonio.  Her husband had been there for weeks of Guard training and she was heading down to visit him.  Tickets to S.A. from MT are cheap, more doable on a Single Mom Budget than a ticket to Alaska, so I was all over that invitation.  Besides, it's Texas... in February.  I went and did some inviting of my own.  San Antonio is where my brother D and his wife K lived when they met, so they've got lots of special memories there.  They were easily convinced and they brought my nephew along too...


D and I had more fun than any two adults should be allowed to have in the rain, on a playground.  I'm pretty sure we broke this jeep, but ask me how much I care:

As March turned into April, I was in Seattle.  Among other things, my services were required as it pertains to teaching the short people how to dance at Pink and sampling FAR too much food at trendy downtown restaurants.  The dancing was mostly successful, if you consider Chicken Dancing a genre, and the food passed the inspection of my delicate palate.

Not enough can be said about my four days in the Sea-Tac area.  I will say, not a drop of rain fell until I was on my way to the airport to leave.  I'm not saying it was me, but it was.  The trip was legendary, and quite possibly a movie will be made...

Nearly a dozen years of calling this woman "friend" has, at times, made the unbearable, bearable.  I trust her with anything.  How is it possible that a woman like me is surrounded with this caliber of human?  Someday, I'd like to be HALF the wife, mom, chef, fitness guru, and deep well of wisdom, strength, humor and beauty as this one...

Two quickly became four... Seattle called, they miss us.  I'm coming back, be prepared.

The great thing about my life is that I'm inundated with SO many quality friends!  After recovering from my trip out West, I was happily convinced to take my first trip to Vegas, for my 35th birthday.  Well, a pre-birthday, birthday trip, really.  This woman would be my sister, if I was the one choosing.  In fact, my kids call her "Aunt".  I went with no expectations and came home completely satisfied.  I cannot confirm or deny how MUCH shopping we did, but I will say someone had to buy additional luggage and it barely closed.  Oh, and Vegas made a small world smaller when I found a few of my Alaska girls there too.  Thirty five is my favorite year so far.

Immediately following Vegas, we got the news that my Grandfather was about to pass away.  I'm leaving a lot out here, because there's too much emotion and too many crazy details, but my little sister and I, miraculously, were able to drive to Arkansas together.  After 20 years, the place looked the same as it has last time I was there, the people did not.  Grandpa passed away the day before my actual birthday, so I spent my birthday with this part of my family for the first time in my life.  Avoiding the hard part of the story, I'll fast forward to the part I love:  Even in the tough stuff of life, I was blessed beyond my expectations.  Love, Mercy, Compassion, Forgiveness and Peace mingled with laughter and tears.  

My sister and I spent my birthday together.  This was the best gift.  The blessing of helping Grandma pick out funeral flowers was strangely sweet:

Summer was tough, like I've told you previously on this blog.  I did, however, find myself laughing from time to time:

There was a wedding party to style, along with some rain to dance in.  We smiled a LOT on this day...

There was a vicarious return trip to Seattle as a head on a stick.  The girls took me to dinner and a concert.  I should add that it's the best date I've had all year aaaand they kept me up to date via text the whole night.  I have never enjoyed a night of texting so much.

There were countless evenings like this one, with my fake sister-in-law.  She's always good for something.  Whether it be a two mile walk after an eleven hour day on my feet, you know, to clear my head... or a whole day of "grammin" (photo taking/editing).  This one can make a stranger grin, just by the sound of her laugh.  She's a truth speaker too...  Sometimes, uncomfortably so.  I need this in my life.  I love her for her nonsense, depth, integrity, wisdom, sense of humor, experience, insight and honesty.

I picked up a new habit.  It made me meet new people.  It made me smile, a lot.  It's a healthy way to let go of a hard day. 

We went to a couple of the MCB concerts.  I grinned.  And danced.  And sang.

















I shot stuff.  I killed paper, cardboard, glass and aluminum... possibly some dirt.  I smiled. It felt fantastic.

This is my fake big sister.  She is just as fun as she looks here.  She is full of perspective and experience and mercy.  Did I mention she also loves shoes?  Most of my days start with her cheery voice.  Many of my afternoons are peppered with her wisdom.  If my waistline has expanded this year, it's her fault.  She. Is. Fantastic.

I don't usually like purple dinosaurs.  On this day, I did.  I smiled and my kids weren't even embarrassed of me. (Not that I would have cared, mind you, it's my job!)

Concerts and the Fair brought a smile and a giggle or two.  This guy, obviously, is now a friend.  He wears the right team colors.  Also, he's full of humility and depth and grace.  What's another brother, when you've already got five?

We had a photo shoot for our salon's website.  We did get a usable one too, but more importantly, we had FUN.  I think I've told you recently how much these women mean to me...

There was an 80's themed dodge ball team, they insisted we play...  We took home a tourney trophy, for all the wrong reasons.  I did embarrass my kids on this day.  I'm not even slightly sorry.

The Beartooth Pass made me smile.

Barefoot dancing in the snow on the pass made me laugh.

Baseball games with friends were ridiculously fun.

The girl and I ran four 5k races this summer, with one more on the calendar in a few weeks.  She is faster than her mom.  She makes me so proud.

My first, and most definitely not the last, NFL game:  Broncos vs. Steelers, Game One of the regular season.  The kids even cheered for their mom's team back at home.  Dad's team choked.  "It wasn't a surprise" according to one of the offspring; I'll never tell who.  This made me smile, endlessly.

Finally, this fall I was able to take my kids and my fake sister-in-law to South Dakota for this year's "new" family vacation.  We had some amazing conversations and experiences.  I do expect that on this day next year, life will look much different.  However, I have a very good life.  I have grown in a million ways internally, nearly as fast as my children have grown physically.  More importantly, they are amazingly grounded, thoughtful, respectful, intelligent and well adjusted.  

...well, the well-adjusted part is open for interpretation...

Goodnight.